Eres Importante para Mi

After coming back from my vacation to the United States I have been feeling a wide range of emotions, mainly homesickness and shock that I have less than four months here. Seriously, where has the time gone?! I don't think I have ever experienced as many emotions as I have in my eight months of being in Mexico, which is weird because I am not really an overly emotional person. My trip home was so refreshing. I went to a baseball game, I saw my favorite place in the world (Northfield), I caught up with my friends, but most importantly I saw my family. For me being away from my family has been the hardest part of this journey, so it was perfect to be able to see them and catch up. It felt as though no time had passed by.

As I mentioned in the last post about 60 new kids have moved to Cuernavaca from Miacatlan. To be honest, I was quite nervous for them to arrive. I had become very comfortable and close to most of our teenagers who were leaving to be Year of Service in Miacatlan. Side note, I can't remember if I have ever mentioned what a Year of Service is, but it is where the kids give back to the home for two years and help take care of the kids or other needs of the house, after their years of service they go to University for free. I was nervous for many reasons: that they wouldn't like me, that they would judge me for not speaking Spanish well, that they wouldn't care to get to know me, and many more things. I think it was just the anxiety of the unknown. But good thing that anxieties are usually wrong, because the new kids are wonderful. I think I forgot that they had also been in the Miacatlan home and therefore were used to volunteers who don't speak Spanish well and overall the children really enjoy the volunteer's presence. 

The other day when I was making bracelets with one the new girls who I have been growing close to, I asked her a question that I have always been wondering but always too afraid to ask. I asked her how the kids overall feel about the volunteers coming and leaving every six months. I remember this was similar to one of my questions that I asked during my interview. We are working with a vulnerable population of children that have been abandoned or are orphans and may have grown up in unstable and unsafe conditions, so how do they handle the change of volunteers only being physically present for a year of their lives? The girl had the sweetest response. She said she felt like she could represent most of the kids by saying that they need us, that yes we come and go every six months after doing a year of service but that we provide a far greater service than we can imagine. She said that there are volunteers who come and they don't hear from them after they leave. But they value ones that they stay in contact with and who continue to support them even when we can't be physically present. She ended her answer with "me caes bien, Katie y eres importante para mi." Translation: "I like you, Katie and you are important to me." What a reaffirmation, am I right?

There have been many moments throughout these eight months where I have wondered what the heck I am doing here. Every bad day in the office, every moment struggling with a new language and culture, and every call home crying with frustrations has had me questioning if coming to Mexico was the right choice. However, hearing this girl say I have made a difference in her life; getting a letter from one of the kids; having deep and profound conversations with them or ending up in tears because we are laughing so hard has been worth it; these beautiful teenagers have shown me that I have made the right choice, regardless of the difficulties that I have endured because of it. 

I love my kids and every experience I have had with them. A lot of the times I think they are serving me more than I am serving them. Even though this has been the hardest and most life changing thing I have experienced in my 24 years, I wouldn't trade them or this for anything.

PS for more of a detailed insight of what my daily life is like here at Casa Buen Señor you can check out the article a that was recently posted on the NPH International website.

https://www.nph.org/ws/page.php?path=volunteers/articles/mexico/katie_voltestimonial.php